Two days ago I had a chance to be volunteering in an event where I had to tell fairy-tales to children in an elementary school. The objective was to educate children nine values to be highly upheld, and my group got three values to be focused on: bravery (keberanian), awareness (kepedulian) and responsibility (tanggung jawab). Through fairy-tales, the community hopes that the learning will be a lot more fun and enjoyable but educating at the same time.
Telling these children in 4th grader turned out to be an uneasy action. Delivering a fairy-tale to subtly telling them that one must be brave, aware and responsible at the same time needed a big understanding, and I myself needed to be aware toward their responds. If they are playing with their pens, or drawing robots on their notebooks, or making bubbles out of their saliva, that means I failed.
At the last session we had a sharing session where we can talk and discuss many things freely and they have chances to share their stories and ideas. It was fun, yet challenging at the same time. They shared their fears and we discussed how to overcome it. We advised them to be always aware of their surroundings, especially to their friends and try to be always available to offer help to their friends who are in need. We told them that when they are given tasks it means people trust them so don't try to break those trust.
And in the middle of session, all of these hit me to the core and brought me to a realization: Have I applied these values in my life? Am I myself capable enough to uphold those values?
Am I brave enough? Have I found ways to overcome the fears overwhelming me? In fact, can I? Or do I too weak to confess what kind of things scare me in this life?
Am I aware enough? Have I been aware to my surrounding and understand people's circumstances? Am I capable to help people around me who needed me? Or probably it is not about my capability, but have I been compassionate enough to offer them help without them asking for it?
Have I paid attention to people's reactions and feelings toward my words? Have I done actions to prevent myself to hurt other people?
Am I reliable enough? Have I always been responsible for everything I have to do? Have I ever disappoint people who trust me? Do I always done everything well?
These questions started to haunt my mind since that session.
These children saw me as a holy sister who is very wise and kind, and saw me as their role model. In fact, I was the one who was not reliable enough that I broke their trust as someone who is not even near to be perfect to be their role model. I was the one who was not aware enough to see how much my presence could be a bright star and inspiration for them. And I was the one who was not brave enough to admit that I felt so bad about this.
It turned out, I did not teach anyone; instead, I taught my own self three things:
I have to be brave, I have to be aware, and I have to be liable.
Am I capable? We'll see.
Telling these children in 4th grader turned out to be an uneasy action. Delivering a fairy-tale to subtly telling them that one must be brave, aware and responsible at the same time needed a big understanding, and I myself needed to be aware toward their responds. If they are playing with their pens, or drawing robots on their notebooks, or making bubbles out of their saliva, that means I failed.
At the last session we had a sharing session where we can talk and discuss many things freely and they have chances to share their stories and ideas. It was fun, yet challenging at the same time. They shared their fears and we discussed how to overcome it. We advised them to be always aware of their surroundings, especially to their friends and try to be always available to offer help to their friends who are in need. We told them that when they are given tasks it means people trust them so don't try to break those trust.
And in the middle of session, all of these hit me to the core and brought me to a realization: Have I applied these values in my life? Am I myself capable enough to uphold those values?
Am I brave enough? Have I found ways to overcome the fears overwhelming me? In fact, can I? Or do I too weak to confess what kind of things scare me in this life?
Am I aware enough? Have I been aware to my surrounding and understand people's circumstances? Am I capable to help people around me who needed me? Or probably it is not about my capability, but have I been compassionate enough to offer them help without them asking for it?
Have I paid attention to people's reactions and feelings toward my words? Have I done actions to prevent myself to hurt other people?
Am I reliable enough? Have I always been responsible for everything I have to do? Have I ever disappoint people who trust me? Do I always done everything well?
These questions started to haunt my mind since that session.
These children saw me as a holy sister who is very wise and kind, and saw me as their role model. In fact, I was the one who was not reliable enough that I broke their trust as someone who is not even near to be perfect to be their role model. I was the one who was not aware enough to see how much my presence could be a bright star and inspiration for them. And I was the one who was not brave enough to admit that I felt so bad about this.
It turned out, I did not teach anyone; instead, I taught my own self three things:
I have to be brave, I have to be aware, and I have to be liable.
Am I capable? We'll see.